i haven’t really blogged lately and I am sorry for that. Just a few minutes ago I get a IM from a friend that tells me she was dumped. Yet again. Now I am no Dr Phil but I have told this girl over and over and….etc…well you get the picture. I told her that her “need” to constantly have a man in her life is that her problem is. So I asked her if she slept with him and she says “of course.” Wow! I mean seriously, are some women really that crazy that they just hook up with a guy and give it up that fast?
So anyway, I ask her why and what the deal was and she tells me that he now says he feels “different.” Well of course he is going to feel different. He already done “hit it and forget it.” LOL I mean come on people thats just crazy if a woman is going to just keep dating new guys. A friend of mine that lived across the street from me when I was in high school was like this. She had a new boyfriend pretty much every week.
So the subject of this blog is the female loop. Why? I guess because it seems that every time I talk to this girl she is upset about some guy having dumped her. Then she says “you only wanted me when you was desperate.” OK, lets dissect this for a moment. The girl is pretty. Yes she is but her outlook on life and the constant need for having a boyfriend is not attractive. Ok, I am 34 years old. I know women and men have multiple sex partners but over the last year I can recall the number of guys she has dated and im sure all of the “hit it.” Now thats just crazy and to be honest with you, I wouldnt want to put my cock into a woman that has been with more men than she can count and doesn’t even know where those guys have been. I love sex but NOT that much.
Going back to the female loop subject; she also throws this in my face every time about how I wouldn’t want her. If this girl wasn’t so depressed about her sexual life and actually would stop and think before dating some of these men then she wouldn’t be the train wreck she is now. I love women but I dont fuck every one of them I meet! If that had happened all the time then some of the women that read my blogs on here would have been sperm recipients from me LOL.
Over the months and months of relentless traveling I have done I have discovered some things about me that I will probably go over in my next blog. Through that self-discovery I realized why I want to be single and not have any kids. As much as I love kids, I just dont want to have any right now in my life nor do I want to be a replacement daddy for some woman’s kids. Its a liberating feeling being able to pack my bags and leave at the drop of a hat. No strings attached. No woman or child asking when will I return. So this female loop with this girl is just driving me insane.
Sometime last year I had been talking to an old friend from online. She was the first female friend I ever had online. Went for years not talking to her and one day i found her again. I thought that was quite cool. I really liked this girl but of course things change when you add in kids and the fact that she is married! I can’t be fucking around with married women. That was the biggest drawback for me. If she was single then sure I probably would have thought differently. Then again many thoughts raced though my head like……would she want me to leave Malibu CA for the North USA? I can’t do that. I love where I live. Why leave it? So i bet your thinking, “Hey Grylls what the fuck does this have to do with the Female Loop?” Well, let me tell you. I would talk to this girl and things seemed fine. Then suddenly it was right back to the whole “you dont like me or want to be with me thing.” She is probably reading this now as she knows of this blog. Oops! LOL. Well like I said before, if I was the old Gill that wanted kids and a wife then I probably would have waited to pursue something but that is the OLD Gill. The NEW Gill wants to ride his BMW R1200GS and travel the world on two wheels. Recently I came back from a lengthy motorcycle trip south of the USA border into Mexico, Guatemala, Belize and Costa Rica. If I had a wife and kids, I would have been bitched at for being away for so long and having someone want to tag along. I guess my point is, I learned that the female loop which just to me is total crap annoyed me so much that I had to change my outlook on life.
Much of that is my fault but in life we make mistakes. I know my good friend and fellow Slipknot bro Denis will have some comments on this I hope. This guy is like a brother for real. My shadow from overseas that gives me such interesting insight to the things that are so simple yet I make them so hard at times to understand.
In my next blog I will write a little bit about my last few months on the motorcycle and what I experienced and what I got to see. For your viewing pleasure I will post a pic of the beach at Tobacco Caye for you to see how I was able to relax my soul or as Neil Peart would call it, “my little baby soul.” Neil has been an inspiration to me in my traveling over the last year and his books and his music have been a huge part of my life. One of the reason why i tell people that not only Neil Peart but Rush and their music is the soundtrack to my life!
Thanx for listening/reading!
Enjoy the pic
Gill Grylls

View From My Hammock
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