Mutiny on the Road!

damn cops! so yeah this time i didnt get pulled over but one of the guys did. I swear I think cops do it because they run the plates and realize who “he” is. I guess a fan of NEP would know that he isnt much on talking to strangers. Its not to be mean. Its just that its a bit scary for the guy. Good thing there is Michael around for him. I dont think im very intimidating on the seat of a BMW R1200GS lol but dont let my hispanic attitude come out.

So the cop at first is walking over with a huge smile on his face. Eventually after a 10 minute what he calls a “routine” stop the cop give him a warning and gets himself an autograph. Kinda a cheesy way to get an autograph eh? Cops!! Kinda reminds me of the Gabriel Iglesias joke where he mentioned giving the cop donuts LOL. Oh yeah im sure that cop would have been pissed off. After all it was a fucking Texas State Trooper. I think he was more star struck though than anything. I dont recall ever seeing a trooper smile that much in my life, especially in TX.

So we left Tulsa and headed for San Antonio. What I call the VERY scenic route. Left Tulsa south on 75 going through Okmulgee. Funny name eh? Making our way south to McAlester and then heading southwest on 69 or if you still want to call it 75. Eventually it takes you into TX and into Dallas where 75 turns into I-45. Didnt go that way though. There was something about the town of Atoka. I just liked it. Nice place to stop and just relax a bit. Funny though because there was NO Jack in the Box’s along the way. If you have ever been north on 75 going into OK then you know once you leave TX you are shit out of luck finding a Jack in the Crack. So we stopped for something to each and I opted for Jack in the Box rather than some ol’ diner. Oh yeah Ultimate Cheeseburger, medium fries and a fucking cold ass drink. I swear I re-filled my drink 3 times. I paid for it later with piss breaks. Ehhhhhh!

After a quick 30 minute food frenzy we headed out again. We had different ideas about where to go. Mutiny I tell you! Lets go this way….No lets go that way…..No, I think we should go this way. Talk about deviating from GPS plans. I had looked into a nice route that would go west of Dallas. Leading us to Fredricksburg and eventually into San Antonio. AT&T Center is not right in the heart of San Antonio so its good that there wouldnt be a traffic catastrophe there! So we decided to deviate from 75 and take 121 southwest into Grapevine, Richland Hills area and into Fort Worth.

Not a big fan of taking freeways but we did leave 121 and hopped on I-35W and into Burleson. A town that brings back memories. I used to go there every summer break from school and stay with my aunt and uncle for a week or so. I loved it. Back then we would goto a place called Brown’s Mountain. Nice views of Burleson, Fort Worth and beyond from there. I remember the one time my cousin Jason and I borrowed my uncle Mike’s blazer with permission and we sped off up Brown’s Mountain and into the nearby neighborhood where we found a baseball field and park. We started doing huge ass donuts in the truck and suddenly without warning…. …WHACK! I accidentally slammed the driver side door into a huge wood post. Oh the agony. The pain I suddenly felt. No not whiplash. My asscheeks getting a beating for fucking the blazer up. We got out and just stared at the damage for about 15 minutes. Dazed….Confused….WTF?!? I was in this “why does shit like this always happen to me” mood. After the initial shock wore off we went back up to Brown’s Mountain and parked in an empty lot where a house was soon to be built in a cul de sac. We looked out to Fort Worth and into the skies seeing the airliners coming in and leaving and then we just sat there. “What do I tell Uncle Mike?” My cousin kept saying “I dont know cuz.” There was no holding back now. It was getting dark and we promised to be back before it was too late. So we got back in the truck and headed back. A drive that only takes ………5 minutes!!! They lived in a subdivision right off the road Brown’s Mountain was on which eventually was a back road you could take into Crowley. I kept thinking why couldnt this be a longer drive. We made it back though and we just confessed the truth. The truth shall set you free…..PRAISE THE LORT! lol….Hallelujer!!! lol……So we did…correction I did get in a little bit of trouble but my Uncle Mike was cool about it and he didnt think much of it anymore after the next day. Later on we had a few Lone Star beers outside in the backyard and he told me I kinda did him a favor because he was ready to get rid of that blazer and get a new truck anyways! BINGO! Not in trouble! This coming from the same Uncle Mike that would head down the hill to Albertson’s and buy me a case of Lone Star Light! LOL. Hey I was young and any kind of beer I could consume was cool to me! Those were the days. The days that started my traveling trek.

So we left the hoorah of the big city and ended up on 67. The names of towns began to remind me of many things. Cleburne….reminded me of the ol’ Cleburne Cafeteria in Sugar Land across from the Imperial Sugar Plant. Then there was Nemo. Enough said….unless you just really are that out of sync and dont know but Nemo is the name of the fish in the Pixar movie Finding Nemo. Then came Dublin. Yeah I was thinking “OK Dublin TX! Maybe its like Dublin Ireland and ill find a pub with some good ol’ Guinness!” Yeah right, but a nice place to pass through indeed! We passed by Proctor Lake…..Yeah ever seen the Police Academy movies? Ok so there was a character named Proctor. Well that came to mind. See, my mind was in motion. Its not over yet! Farther up was Comanche! Self-explanatory right? Then the aptly named town Blanket! I think you can see why I chose this route. Blanket being the name of one of the Jackson kids!

We came to Brownwood and the road turned into 377. I was once again needing a “waterfall” break. Eh last time i down 3 refills of fucking coke! lol….We passed a few towns like Brady and Mason. Funny, I knew guys by those names in high school. For the most part nothing really except for nice scenery and some really good spots to take pics. Signs were welcoming us with the thought of Fredricksburg not too far away and once again the road signs went from saying 377 to 87. Geez make up your mind man! Must have been drunk Texans giving the roads their numeric names.

Before getting to Fredricksburg we stopped for a little break to walk around and just relax. I settled under a nice shady tree and The road up ahead mentioned Luckenbach. Where Willie Nelson always holds his music festivals. At this point we broke off and I went solo. I continued down 87 until I got to I-10 while the guys broke off and headed to Luckenbach and eventually to the Canyon Lake area into New Braunfels and eventually to I-10 from the other direction near Seguin and we met up at the hotel in downtown just 15 minutes away. Not that I need to but I checked in under the name Buzz Buzzer and the hotel clerk started laughing. I think she needed that laugh too. She looked stressed. Gotta love per diems! Later that evening we met up and was asked where was a good place to eat. So I mentioned Chris Madrid’s Hamburgers and I got the ok to order! Then a local told me the best burgers were from The Lord’s Kitchen. I though he was fucking talking shit but there really is a place there called that. We didnt go there though. Figured it was best to stay with first laid plans. So I brought up the menu and we made our decisions. Last time i was there i got the Tostada Burger Regular and it was damn good. I figured I would just get the same thing. Also in that order was a Porky’s Delight and a Flaming Jalapeno Burgers. This time I opted for the Macho size. Holy Fuck!! can you say food!!! Shit! Damn near killed myself eating that thing! If your ever in San Antonio TX and want a good burger just look up or look up Taco Haven off Presa. Damn good menudo and stuff…..

So with the 3rd leg well in motion and Boston, Pittsburgh, Bristow, Tulsa and soon San Antonio out of the way, that leaves Houston, Dallas, Atlanta, Tampa and West Palm Beach for the USA dates. Then a short break and off to Sur America for four more dates winding down this lovely tour and back home to my cats and my lazy life lol. Yeah I kinda miss that! I dont go out much but im sure one of my good female friends would like her shopping buddy back! LOL….Spend spend spend!!! Lets just hope no more mutiny on the road! Houston is notorious for arresting rockstars for some ungodly reason so they can make a name for themselves. Lets see…..Marilyn Manson, Ozzy, Angus Young, Santana, Cash Money Millionaires…just to name a few!

From Tulsa to San Antonio was one of my favorite rides. For 616 miles it was a nice ride. Its now 2:15am and im beginning to think the route planned for Friday into Corpus Christi is going to be changed. I think i’d rather take I-10 right into Houston to the Beltway and maybe even sleep in my own cozy bed. Who knows. Im too spontaneous. Ill say it but watch I wont do it!


2 responses to “Mutiny on the Road!

  1. And who is Michael? 8)) A bodyguard or?
    Kelly Clarkson is from Burleson. Blanket is a very strange name 8))
    I wish I was travelling like that too, and had such hard decision to make which route to go 8))
    I have just eaten my dinner, and while reading this -I just get hungry again 8)
    Buzz Buzzer LOL

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