So i called to say hi to my grandmother. She wasnt home. She is staying with my aunt that lives out in Spring TX area. My aunt that answers the phone treats me like shit. As if I had done something wrong. She is rude on the phone. So I just said ok bye.
Seems I come across people with attitudes these days. The woman my father married never liked me. Always treated me like I am shit. Always left me out of any gatherings but always invited her kids to everything. My mothers husband is an asshole. He thinks he is gods gift to women. This is the same guy I beat the shit out of back when I was in high school because he attacked me. Her husband calls me fat fuck, lazy fucker, sissy, pussy, sorry mother fucker….etc….Ive tried giving respect to him but how can i when I get treated like shit? I do nothing and he calls me names. im never around!
Im SICK of it all. Im sick of people taking advantage of me. Its partially my fault for letting people get to me and letting them use me but I am tired of it and I am not going to put up with this shit anymore. To be honest with you, I really dont have any friends. I mean I have a few but they are always busy. No more guys night out. When my friends do want to go out they want to goto clubs. I HATE clubs. I look like a pathetic loser going to a club at 33.
I guess to people I really dont amount to shit. Everyone treats me like shit. Calls me names, says im fat….I give up. This is why I am always to myself and never around people anymore. This is why motorcycle riding has become my favorite thing to do. I cant even find a girlfriend. Im either to fat or too good or not a bad boy or I dont listen to rap…There is always something wrong with me. I give up. This is why I just feel I will keep to myself. Im sick of wanting people to respect me, like me….My friends on the internet, many are the best of friends. You know who yoou are….Stang, Jenny, Shack, Rich, Cindy, etc….You can make me feel good by saying you are there for me cause I know you are but I dont have the interaction I wish I had with people. Everyone I would want to hang out with is so far away.
Seeing Europe from a motorcycle is awesome. Not many will do this but its worth the time and effort. When I put the key in the bike and start her up I am at peace with myself. I enjoy the scenery. Seems this is the only way i can have any solace in my life. I just feel like everyone fucking hates me but I dont know why. Once again, those of you can comment on this and say you dont hate me and that matters but I think you have to see it from another point of view, the people i interact with. My family treats me like they hate me. My mother chooses her husband over me. He calls me names and she says nothing. My family wrote me off. My ex-gf is one of the only friends I have but I still love her and I cant have her. I can’t find a woman to date. I honestly give up with life. Fuck life…..”Fuck it all, fuck this world, fuck everything that you stand for, dont belong dont exist, dont give a shit, dont ever judge me” – Surfacing – Slipknot
Got lost again but in France this time
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